I have been thinking a lot this month about budgeting.

It has been one of those months... where there more days than dollars.
(Nothing serious, just way more effort to stick to the budget)

For 14 years, we have been paid on the 1st of the month.
Efficiently,
Automatically,
Like clock work.

For 7 years, we have had a monthly budget meeting.
R and I,
1st Friday of the month,
Almost like clock work.
(You know, life happens)


The practice began as a necessity.
It was one tool taught to us by the therapist we were seeing at the time.
It is one of many tools that saved us.

Really, the object was communication...
even in the financial part of our lives.

We fill in an established budget form.
We notice any changes.
We check totals on our various accounts.
We check see that our debt is decreasing and our investments are increasing.
We set goals for the current month.
Together, we anticipate what we will need to spend money on...
(haircuts, birthdays, receptions, showers, tournaments, fairs, trips...)
We review how we did on the previous month.

We "spend" every cent on paper, before we spend it for reals.

I know stuff like this comes naturally for many couples, but not for us.
We learned that we have to plan it and organize it.
We learned that and now we do it.

Hooray for us :)

And now, I ponder the concept of budgeting time.
I have the same amount as you.
Yet, our lives are so different.
I mean, as far as talents, hobbies, interests, schedules...

I do so much,
but I could do so much differently.

Really, the possibilities are endless.
If I clear my schedule,
first put in the necessities,
and what is most important,
and schedule in the things I will do to become the person I want to be,
and plan to act when I am prompted,

the possibilities really are endless.

Fall Break

Hooray! No routines for the week!

Monday:

2 dozen free for great report cards...



and they were PINK!

We also picked up 15 tokens per report card from Chuck E Cheese... we collect them for each report card until we have enough for a family outing.

We spent a couple of hours "browsing" the shelves of Toys For Us. It had been ages since we had done it, but our "babes" all love to play through the aisles.
We even got some great ideas for a certain upcoming holiday ;)

My boys are always wanting to visit the Halloween stores that emerge this time of year.
Dad thought it was a great idea.
We didn't last long inside... YUCK!

Finally, we watched the new Karate Kid in the basement for the afternoon.
Fun movie.

Tuesday:

I did chores.
The boys ate and read and ate and read and ate and read.
Hmmm...

Wednesday:

I did chores.
The boys ateandreadandateandreadand...

WAIT, that was YESTERDAY!
so, I had a fit.
not cool.

WE did chores.
We escaped to Granny's house.
We ate lunch.
We played with cousins.
Some of us SWAM... in OCTOBER!

2 stayed for movie night
and then slept on the couches
and had apple stuffed french toast for breakfast.

Thursday:

Surprise!
Appointments for everyone to go see Dr. Lim!
For flu shots!

We love Dr. Lim.
We don't love shots.

Everyone cried.
1 person even had a panic attack and had to be taken to R's hospital to get his.
I got one at PIMC too.

We went to Costco for lunch and saw friends.
We went to Last Chance and saw another friend.
We went to Sheplers to buy T her first pair of cowgirl boots with birthday $ from Papa.
She wouldn't keep them on, so we didn't buy them.

We pitched our tent in the backyard.
We read by the light of our headlamps until we fell asleep.

Then, I snuck back in to watch the end of "runway" with R.

Friday:


Cereal for breakfast?!
With cartoons?!

Oh what the heck, we're on vacation!

And I think, after chores (it's already 10am) we will head to Main to enjoy the shops and statues.

BYE!

Recycled Crafts and Pesto

I am the first to admit that I have probably hampered the creativity of my children.

I RARELY encourage (or allow) any kind of activity that is cutty, gluey, markery, or glittery.
In my opinion, they spread too far and... I just don't like the mess.

L came up with this one all on his own. I sometimes feel like he tries too hard to keep up with his older brothers and what they do, so I was so happy when he started a creative kid project. He even let T join him... bonus!See the stairs up one side and the slide down the other?

I even let it live on the counter for 4 days :)

Unrelated, our basil plant in the garden is the size of a young hippo. Probably bigger than it should be. I am unsure how to tame it or whether or not we should cut it wayyyy back.
I did decide to make pesto... a first for me. I used almonds instead of pine nuts. It is really great on grilled pizzas.

It was also delicious on this!

A couple of other interesting harvests recently...

Dad has been collecting the olives off his tree instead of complaining about the mess they make. He has learned to brine them and has used many different concoctions for flavors. My favorite have been the lightly salted. They are just smooth and soft... almost buttery. He has offered to teach me, so I'll have to take him up on it!

A neighbor spread a sheet under her palm trees and has been collecting the falling dates. They are sweet and delicious! I was gifted an entire bag of them, already dried. I could eat them like candy, but I think I will bottle and save some and add some of their deliciousness to granola when I make it.

Which One?

A while ago my sisters joined a running club. Not all of them but a few of them. L goes to the gym daily and sings in an amazing choir on Thursday nights. E and KK enter races. J directs a major musical production yearly. M is the president and owner of a company that employs 120+ people. D and S are PTO presidents at their children's schools. J and J have full-time jobs AND take care of their families. J and T teach weekly classes.

I am constantly amazed at the huge undertakings my friends and family are involved in. They spend hours organizing, planning and practicing for their projects and hobbies and interests and commitments.

Most days, I don't even want to leave my house.

Recently, I have felt guilt about the fact that I don't even want to be involved in any of this stuff...


so, I am trying to decide...

con·tent

–adjective

1.

satisfied with what one is or has; not wanting more or anything else.




OR

com·pla·cent

1.
pleased, esp. with oneself or one's merits, advantages, situation, etc., often without awareness of some potential danger or defect; self satisfied.




or... maybe lazy? (i hope not)

It's quite a notion to ponder.

Family Home Evening

Monday nights, we have a ritual.

We sing hymns.

We discuss the schedule for the week.

We study the scriptures.

Last night, before we finished with our family prayer and bedtime, the boys challenged dad to a "wrastle".

Each person had their turn.

This does look promising for L, but...

Dad is still king.

Then, the boys challenged each other and then me.

It was a fun time.

I did learn that I should have specifically mentioned to J the "no choke holds" rule.
Silly me, I thought it was understood :)

Be There

Last night, K had her first big deal, real concert at BYU as a Singer. She has another performance tonight. I wish I was there. Listening. Watching. Supporting. Enjoying.

When K was choosing where to go to school, I remember telling her that if she was at NAU I would be able to come to more of her performances. No such luck.

We are so happy with her choice, but still wish we could be there.

With 6, R and I are usually spread thin. Too many nights are double, triple and even more over-booked. Usually, we divide and conquer... or hope to conquer. He goes one way, I go another, we meet up, swap babies, cab duties, etc., just so that we can be there.

Friday, though, was a real treat. 2 boys, 1 activity. Jackpot.



The weather was perfect and we had popcorn and licorice. We were ready!



L is on the drum line at Mt. V. for his second year. J plays in an advanced band in his first year at P Jr. High. J switches between trumpet, baritone, and tuba/sousaphone.
Each year, the high school marching band invites all of the jr. high bands that feed into it to come for jr. high night. The bands rehearse, eat pizza, play stand tunes, and perform at half time. It really gets the jr. high kids excited about adventures to come. Except J. He performed that night with the sousaphone and decided he will never march with one again. Who can blame him?

Yes, she fell asleep for an hour, right in the middle of all the fun!



It was so nice to be there.

A Lesson

Sometimes, the boys are ornery.

They trudge upstairs and then stomp around. They have claws drawn and teeth bared and through scowled brows, challenge each other to just dare to get in their way.

They yell, they be-little, they growl, they offend.

They tolerate nothing.

EVERYTHING and EVERYTHING offends them.

I have learned that if I react to their behavior, it feeds the ugliness.

If I can corner them, away for their peers, for just a moment, I can whisper sweet nothings and calm their spirits.

I can remind them that if everything is bothering them, the problem isn't everything, it is them.

Sometimes, that is hard to swallow, but I excuse them to their room to breathe and relax and pray and transform back into the loving man-child they are.

If the offense is rooted deeply, I follow them into their room, invite them to kneel, and I pray.

I thank Heavenly Father for them. I list their talents and virtues individually and tell Heavenly Father the important part they play in our home. Then, I implore Him to help my son overcome his frustrations and feel love and peace and joy.


Sunday was one of those days. The offense came from small, unkind quips and inconsiderate behaviors and not having help when help was needed.

By the time we were on our way to church, tensions were running high. A gentle reminder to not yell requests from one room to the other, but deliver the requests face-to-face was the last straw.

I LOST IT!

I yelled inappropriate AND unkind accusations at my tall son.

I slammed the doors to the van.

In the parking lot.

At church.

I was in no condition to walk in, so I stomped... quietly.

R was already there, on our side pew. I pushed past, ignoring his greeting smile and then puzzled look. With R as a barrier between the children and myself, I pressed my shoulder to the wall, willing it to give way and swallow me up.

Instead, I was pulled away by a firm pulsing grip on my hand. The tears started to fall, but were quickly caught by the tissue that had been pressed into my palm... just like when we saw Stella together on our first outing (not a date because it was the first day we met and were with a big group of friends).

He was in my corner. He was telling me he had my back.


As I sat, I realized that my tall son had remained calm. He never did react to my tantrum.

I was offended because some of his words stung. They were true and it hurt.

I nursed my wounded pride and half listened to the speakers and the lessons.


Later that day, I told R of all my ugliness. He loved my anyway.

I apologized, and so did L.


It is a hard lesson for me to learn that my kids see me as I really am. It is hard to realize that I really do have to step up and do what I teach. All of it. I have to be better than I want them to be.

I have to listen to what the Spirit tells me to tell them:

If everything is bothering me, the problem is not everything, it is me...

And then take a time out...

...Before it gets ugly.

Happy Birthday, Baby!

Sacrifice

I have always know that being a parent comes with inherent sacrifices.

I didn't know this was one of them.



Since K left for school with our 1 good flat iron, my hair has looked like this.
I feel like my un-done tresses could be used by Larainy Days if she did a "Help This Hair!" post.

I love how my hair looks after a great cut and blow dry
so

I tried this...


Apparently, I have NO SKILLS.
I won't even post the picture.

I was ecstatic when I saw this beauty on sale at Marshalls.
And it's pink, bonus!

I washed and dried and creamy-conditioned.
I even flat-iron-heat-protection treated.

Ta-da!!!



Um, yeah...

That baby is going straight back to Marshalls.
Dang!

And I am going to have to splurge for an actual usable of a flat-iron.

Reading

The Stars Have Aligned.

Could that be the only possible explanation for the fact that I am reading a book?

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE to read.
At this point in my life, however, pleasure reading takes a back seat to, well, EVERYTHING!
Or, almost everything :)

I am reading

Mockingjay
by
Suzanne Collins.

I am nearly finished and I am really enjoying it.
Fortunate, since it's one I feel I have to read.

Let me explain:
Kids have a mind of their own. I know you know that. Most at our house are avid readers. They bring books home from where ever and when ever they can. Most of the time that is ok. As a matter of fact, I have not had to ban any that they have brought home.
But how would I happen to know that?
I either read to them, with them, or before them.
I have checked book reviews online and sought out the opinions of friends.
But, most often, if I have never heard of it, I read it myself at the same time they are.


They know I know what they know, sort of. :)
We discuss characters and plots and what-ifs.
It gives us more in common.

And, most of the time, it's fun.